We are delighted that Pauline Milsted, Children, Family and Youth Minister in the Blyth Valley Team, attended the Messy Church Conference in June this year.
Please read her full report below:
As the Children, Family and Youth Worker for the Blyth Valley Churches I was lucky enough to go to the Messy Church Conference 2025. The theme for this year was ‘All Together’ and it was a fantastic time of coming together in fellowship, encouraging conversations, excitement, inspiration, fantastic food, new friendships and fun. There were 14 countries, from the UK to Australia, at this international conference where we all came together to share how we are sharing God with children and families through Messy Church (or our children, youth and family work). The enthusiasm and passion that worked its way through all conversations truly re-set the fire inside me. In the Blyth Valley Churches, we do many elements of Messy Church but currently do not run a typical Messy Church. This didn’t matter as there was still lots of inspiration, encouragement and ideas shared.
As we all gathered on the Friday night, the new Messy Momentum project was shared by the team. This is a project, funded by the Church of England Missional Funding Team, that focuses on what happens with our 12 to 16 year olds when they phase out of ‘traditional’ Messy Church, and/or as a group want something different. It was really inspiring to hear about the pilots that will be launching in Autumn with potential funding for those who already have a Messy Church. We discussed all of the developing ideas in groups, and I was in a group with the amazing Lucy Moore (original founder of Messy Church), trying not to fan girl and concentrate on the task in hand! My favourite ideas were shared by a lady from Preston who talked about how their Diocese got all the local church youth groups together for a silent disco and then, in one of their big churches, held a roller blade disco! I loved this idea and could see Archdeacon Rich and Bishop Graeme skating around Bury St Edmunds Cathedral. The team are looking for 30 Messy Churches to be part of their pilot approaches – starting in Autumn. If the Messy Momentum Project is something you might want to be involved in, you can check out more information here:
On Saturday morning, our keynote speaker was Lorraine Prince, head of Networks in the Church of England Education Team. We explored the notion of ‘beloved belonging’ and how we create a psychologically safe intergenerational space. This was something that discussions, workshops and talks throughout the weekend kept coming back to, especially step one—before we can do anything we need to relate, producing comes second. We simply cannot produce without first relating to people by entering into relationship and getting to know them. This can often feel time consuming and never-ending, but for me it reconfirmed that developing those authentic relationships with others is often the most important part of my role. I simply cannot do the rest of my job without them!
Another thing that really struck me was the idea of ‘beloved belonging’. I love this phrase and funnily enough this is something some of the Blyth Valley Team and I have been discussing in the past week—how do we create a safe space of belonging and love? Father Greggory Boyle talked on this subject and shared a video. There is connection with a larger love — standing at the margins with those on the edge of our community is how we move or eradicate those margins. We all have a deep human longing to be relational in order to experience wholeness, and no one is outside of our compassion. If we have no kinship, we have no peace, no justice, no equality, no kindness. So, the big question for discussion is how do we create safe spaces where people can truly experience a sense of beloved belonging? What will that look like in your church or churches?
On both Saturday and Sunday morning there was opportunity to go to a workshop of your choosing (I wish there was more time to attend them all, or perhaps next time I need to bring a partner in crime so we can go to different workshops and share ideas). I went to an inspiring Autism Workshop, with Kirstyn Oliver from Alma Autism UK. I was called to go this session as we have several children attending our events who have an Autism Spectrum Condition and, beyond Messy Church, I wanted to deepen my own understanding and explore how we can become more inclusive and support these families. It was very insightful, providing tools to add to our toolbox, for example, having a visual routine timetable, recognising the importance of repetition and routine in helping to reduce anxiety, and having sensory bags available at our services. This lovely quote “When a flower doesn’t bloom, you fix the environment in which it grows not the flower” reminds us to think about our environment in general. Remembering to relate before we try and produce, we need to understand individuals as all our autistic children will all be different and unique. So, another challenge—what do we need to be changing in our environment? How can we create physical safety, relational safety and transitional safety for everyone?
Throughout the weekend, our focus was,
‘We are all the body of Christ’ and 1 Corinthians 12 v 12-31
This passage was used as we talked, studied, dwelled in the word, celebrated, worshipped and participated in Messy Church. One of the other keynote speakers was Sam Richards, head of Children and Youth Work at the URC, who talked about how the body of Christ is intergenerational and that being an intergenerational church is so much more than a church that simply meets all together. We need to recognise how, no matter our age, everyone brings a gift, everyone leaves with a blessing. So, the challenges are to be intentional, to consider how we relate to one another and how we enrich the way we encounter differences?
We also experienced a Messy Prayer Space, a Messy Church session and Messy Church Goes Wild, which added so much practicality and fun to the deep provoking questions and discussions throughout the weekend. There is a lot to ponder, lots of useful ideas and thoughts to take away. I hope this write up inspires some conversations in your churches too! If you can, I would definitely recommend going to the next Messy Church Conference.
For further information
Please email: Laura Mumford | Diocesan Growing Younger Enabler, 07394 559889.
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